Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
