I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize