i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
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