Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Randomize
