I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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