just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
