I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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