Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
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so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
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I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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