so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize