Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize