Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
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It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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