The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
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Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
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Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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