apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Shame - the story of my life.
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