It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Sober January is a disaster.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
