May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
