The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize