Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
