Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
