I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Actions speak louder than pants.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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