Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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