scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"