yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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