she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
