I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
