It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Randomize
