i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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