wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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