She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
