we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
