It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
