I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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