I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
