I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize