You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
You ruined the universe
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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