So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize