Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
