I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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