I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
