break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
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