I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize
