So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
