I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize