Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
