I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize