I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Randomize
