you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I have feelings that need drinking.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
