WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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