We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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