I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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