we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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